We had our first session of women's Bible study at church tonight. Childcare was provided (and so appreciated!) along with coffee and deliciousness.

We discussed idols. Do you worship God but serve other idols? Do you identify first and foremost as a child of God or as something else, i.e. mother, employee, hippie, activist, citizen, or wife? To whom do you give your valuable resources like time, focus, money, and heart?

I try to hold myself accountable to God's expectations for worship, and I notice that I tend to struggle with the identifying portion of it. I often feel defined by motherhood specifically and feel that I serve that idol before God frequently. It is demanding and urgent, it seems, and it's easy to lose focus of my own heart and desire for truth and growth in the spirit, and instead focus on the macaroni boiling or the milk on the floor or the check for school pictures or the halloween costumes I ordered three days too late.

Tonight I pray that God helps me stay focused in both my worship and my service. I fully trust that if I focus my heart on him and pursue him steadfastly, he will change the monster responsibilities into mere details of daily living.

And now...my kitchen smells like tuna. Off to clean.

loved this article.

Dare to Lead from Healing | Gifted for Leadership | Women Called to Ministry

I love Fridays.

Carry on.

ridiculously incredible...because it's an awesome thing to say.

I found a man who places greater value on the beauty within than the beauty without.

This is so incredibly different from everything I have ever known and is challenging me in a new and amazing way. Instead of practicing my makeup techniques, doing a little extra yoga, and replacing my thrifty wardrobe, I must seek Christ and his power and willingness to restore and make whole and beautiful. In order to please this amazing man of God, I must know God, must seek his heart, obey his commands for my life, and love myself through his eyes. In order to accept his love I must trust that I am a child of God, valuable and pleasing.

How can I doubt that this is God's desire when it requires such intimacy with the Holy Spirit in order to move forward and so wonderfully glorifies God throughout the process?

Amazing how God's gifts to us ultimately bring the glory back to him. I am ever grateful for this beautiful mess (God being beautiful and me being the mess!) that is my life.

I had a bad day. It started out bad, continued badly through the middle, and almost ended badly. My poor lovely babies must deal with my imperfections, my human failings, and my selfishly indulgent moments that tend to bring more heartache than satisfaction.

Luckily, my children offer redemption for a price. I bought forgiveness for my impatience with six stories, three poems, four tickles, and two home made peanut butter cookies with cold milk.

on obedience.

Do you not know that the unrighteous and the wrongdoers will not inherit or have any share in the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the impure and immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor those who participate in homosexuality, nor cheats, no greedy graspers, nor drunkards, nor foulmouthed revilers and slanderers, nor extortioners and robbers will inherit or have any share of the kingdom of God. - 1 Corinthians 6:9

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ky8dTyPpiAo

This sermon is long but worthy of a frequent listen :)

We do not have assurance, we do not have the Holy Spirit or Christ within us if we live confidently based on our one-time conversion or our years of faithfulness or a word-for-word prayer we recited. In order to be assured that we KNOW our Savior and are guaranteed a place in his eternal presence, we must honor his commandments through CONSISTENT OBEDIENCE.

Do not be fooled, brothers and sisters...if we keep his commandments, we know that we know him.

I am learning :)

The most profound thought in my mind tonight is that a massage would be nearly earth-shatteringly amazing right now.

This body was not designed for physical labor. Any day now, my degree may feel free to go to work for me :)